second place is the first loser.

so, last friday i followed up with hr chick, as instructed by maryse and anna, and ended up leaving her a voicemail. half an hour later, i get a rejection email that the position had been filled internally four days prior, though at the time of our phone conversation, i was the number one candidate. dang. second place, yet again. why would they promise me a face-to-face meeting then screw me over without a timely explanation? if i hadn’t followed up with them, i’m 98% sure they would’ve left me twittling my thumbs indefinitely, which really bothers me because hr chick knew that my spring semester schedule could potentially be affected by whether or not an offer would be made (i would’ve had to remove or reschedule one class, which i was okay with, and told her as much), so i couldn’t be left in the dark.

this was my response:

1/28/11
Dear ________,

Mari

KIDDING. i sure was tempted to send that, though.

looks like it’s back to the grind for me. hr chick said she’s keeping my name at the top of the list of candidates for upcoming opportunities. that’s sweet of her, but i’m done holding my breath with these people. i’m already red in the face from this last merry-go-round she spun me on.

in other news, i’ve decided to take a break from this blog for a little while. actually, i’m taking a break from socializing on the internet, period. i deleted my facebook, deactivated a couple forum accounts, and twitter’s next. nothing particularly horrible or traumatizing has happened (more like the amalgamation of minor annoyances and incidents that have spiked my anxiety levels), i’m just in a weird limbo state right now and i haven’t been compelled to share much. i think between planning to transfer schools, having shit luck finding a job, pets dying, siblings moving, and everything in between, i just have no energy to intelligently and coherently interact with the e-population the way i would like to. most of all, i don’t want to purge all of my negative thoughts into this blog, have it become a huge bitchfest, and rename it “one maxi pad.”

this isn’t the end, guys and dolls. to quote john q, “it’s not goodbye, it’s see you later.”

$$$$$

as much as i despise so many facets of our monetary/class system (no, i’m not a “commie” or a marxist) and corporate politics, i sure do miss working for the man and makin’ decent dough. i hate taking money from my dad and brothers, and can’t help but spend every cent with immense guilt and regret. this job search is really taking a lot out of me, but i’m in no position to take a break from it. i’ve almost completely convinced myself that one of my past employers added my name to some sort of underground blacklist that every human resources manager has access to. this shit’s getting a little (a lot) ridiculous.

i had a phone interview with one of the human resources chicks at the major i mentioned before. we played voicemail tag for 24 hours before we finally got ahold of one another. at 8:45am, oy. i wasn’t even awake yet, so i sounded like an adult bullfrog in labor (mind you, when i’m fully awake i sound like a dying tadpole, so not too much better…), but she seemed to dig me, and to be caught off-guard and half-asleep, i don’t think i was too shabby. she told me i was “great” and that her superior would email me “soon” to schedule a face-to-face meeting. she even gave me her superior’s full name and phone number, so i really thought i had this shit in the bag.

…but that was a week ago.

and as of yesterday, the job opening has been removed from their website.

sigh.

what is “soon,” hr chick?! did you give my dream job to someone else? should i harass your boss and demand a crystal clear answer?

i’m trying not to freak out and over-analyze last week’s conversation (even though i’ve already done that at least 547 times over the past 7 days) and the meaning behind the mysterious disappearance of the job posting, because homegirl is the head of the human resources department at one of the top film and television studios in the world, and i’m sure she has more important things to tend to than entry-level employment requisitions… but i’m bummin’ out, guys. i really, really want this job. a hundred times more than any of the others i applied to. usually, i’m able to stop myself from developing relationships with certain positions, but this job and i, we’re made for one another. it’s mine. and now i’m left feeling like i’ve been stood up on prom night. guess it’s back to the drawing board for me.

all play and no work makes mari a broke girl

hi, new readers! or as charlotte would say: salutations!

thank you to everyone who found my blog via door sixteen (thanks, anna baby!) and left a thoughtful comment on the post i wrote about my kissless existence. while i’m not very shy at all when it comes to sharing my innermost thoughts and feelings, it’s always nice to read the thoughts and stories of other people who can relate to what i have to say. it’s comforting and encouraging.

can you see the ‘coon circles around my eyes?! that’s how exhausted job-hunting has made me! grrrr.

anyway… heavens to betsy, do i need a J-O-B. “pounding the pavement” is a total joke these days. nearly every establishment demands for their application to be filled out online and/or your résumé to be emailed or uploaded to their company’s website. the whole job-hunting process between prospective employer and prospective employee seems so disconnected. and craigslist is nothing but a tease. it seems that all of the jobs i would really like (aka jobs that are related to the industries i aspire to have a career in) are unpaid internships. don’t get me wrong, internships are definitely valuable, but i’m not in the position to take on anything unpaid at the moment outside of school and volunteering. i need bread. dough. clams. lettuce. bones. CASH MONEY.

anderson cooper wasn’t joking around when he said it’s an “employer’s market” out there. the credentials that some employers require for jobs are getting more and more ridiculous by the day. bachelor’s degrees for entry-level receptionist positions. years’ worth of previous experience for general crew positions at chain movie theaters. unbelievable. i’ve been on several interviews over the past few weeks (group interviews, no less, which are horrible and lame — apparently they save the companies time and money, whatever…) and i can’t even make it past the first cut because the employers have the option of choosing people with degrees and boatloads of experience who are super desperate for work due to the economy. ugh! i miss the days where i could troll craigslist for a few hours, land a gig as a production assistant without much hassle, and be done with it.

maybe the next time i go in for an interview i’ll wear my wingtips. that should convince them. imo, they scream “good hire material.”

what do you all do for a living? did you work or intern (or, good heavens, both) during school? how did you get your start?